On distance

Hello everyone,

In this pandemic times, it is really hard for me to find things I want to talk about,

because somehow it does not feel really right. Or does not fit in.

It has been very weird 8 weeks. Seven and half to be exact.

What changed for me in these almost eight weeks?

Well first things first, tennis world stopped. I did not swing the racket , watch tennis

coach or do anything on court.

I had many injuries in my life, but somehow every time I was injured I was still around tennis courts. Right now I don’t even see them. This is very depressing for me. But also it is interesting from psychological point of view. You do learn things, you want it or no , you observe more and you inhale more. I don’t know about you, but my curiosity level skyrocketed. I read and listen more then I could ever imagine, I found out stuff that is really interesting and found plenty of new things I am interested in. I do a lot of home work outs, I do Yoga (I am not the most flexible individual ), but I try, to calm down mostly.

I started multiple online courses, also to kill time. I want to learn German, I have more time now to try to properly learn it, psychology and some other basic certificates that I wanted to have for a while now. I do work on one project on side which is very interesting and I do take part in some discussions about my sport daily.

It should be very positive to have so many things to do, but I do still feel down mentally. Some days more, some days less. I am just very sad, probably because everyone is sad. I started to run twenty days ago,twenty five days ago to be exact. Running always boosts my mood , even now, and I am glad I run. But I can not run 24 hours a day, I wish I could. I also work out at home. I am very productive in general I would say. I am busy all day long and I am always doing something. I don’t really understand people ,who say that they have nothing to do. I do have very much things on my hands. I also have many things in my mind I still can do. I also believe you can always learn or do something new. But still my mood is not of my liking, it is not bad, but not great either. Maybe my mood will boost with the end of pandemic. Or maybe it will improve in a while, it does get better daily, little by little.

I learned new things about myself. Things that I could not observe while I was traveling and playing.

So what changed in 8 weeks? In my life.

First thing that is huge to me is that I can not stand coffee. No, not correct, I love the smell and taste of coffee, I had period in my life when I used to drink 12 cups of coffee a day, then I reduced it on 10, 8 , 5….But for people who know me really well , it is also a very strange change, that now I don’t drink coffee.

Last year I had two cups of coffee for breakfast and one more during a day, so that made my average three cups of coffee a day, sometimes maybe four. I was very fine with it, and maybe the active lifestyle required it, but since I’m home I had two cups a day only. Couple of weeks ago I felt weird sensations in my body, over and over every day, I felt very shaky and anxious, in general I am anxious person, I am emotional, this is my mentality too and lately some things just boosted my anxiety, but still, it was not really familiar feeling what I had, not my basic feelings, so I tried to understand what makes me feel so weird, I didn’t need to wait long, three days of observations showed me, that I felt that way exactly 10 minutes after my second cup of coffee, so I figured that was my body telling me to quit, so I reduced my two cups of coffee and I started to drink one, only

one tasty cup of coffee, when you wake up and the smell kicks in,and that first sip…..But my body apparently had other pans and in couple of days I felt exactly the same after my one cup. So since then, it has been full two weeks I completely stopped to drink my favorite beverage. I even wanted to still feel weird,anxious and shaky after it, as it would be my excuse to have coffee again, but no. So during my not so active lifestyle, my body forbid me literally!!! To drink coffee! Now my beverage is mint leaves, lemon and cinnamon with hot water.

How did my body proceed with it?

Except the fact that like a true addict I really miss the taste and the smell of coffee, I can say that my sleep is way calmer.(which I always thought that I am special and coffee has no effect on my sleep) But I do sleep more calm, I never had trouble falling asleep, but I had trouble to stay asleep at night, that did not happen once in last two weeks. My skin got very bad in first couple of days, I got pimples and rushes everywhere, including neck and shoulders… but after a week now it became more soft and gets cleaner daily. And weirdly, I say weirdly because some people say that coffee helps them with digestion, well opposite here, my digestion is way better these last two weeks. I know that two weeks is not a long time to update on progress, but it was surprising for me, how the absence of my favorite

beverage, changed my body only in two weeks, I am very looking forward to see what is next.

I will post something about it later probably.

Next one is alcohol.

I am a big wine lover. I love wine, nice red wine, in the evening.

My home country Georgia, if you don’t know it, is the cradle of wine. We have fantastic red wine.

Usually when I come home, a glass a day is a must. Not that I don’t enjoy it in France or Italy, but well my Georgian wine is still my favorite. So what can I say, my body decided for me this too.

It was same as with coffee, first I felt very tipsy after a sip. Then I poured a glass of wine and could not drink it, till I got to the point where I didn’t pour it in my glass anymore. Also sad, cause glass of red wine,with a nice book, or in front of the fireplace, or in a good company is really nice, but oh well.

So in eight weeks my body forbid me to drink coffee and wine. And I say forbid not because it was my choice, or I decided so, I literally felt very bad within ten minutes, so it was just a no choice.

I don’t know how my body decided that, or why it did this do me :))) but well new lifestyle required changes I guess. I guess I have a strong character body too, which just demands changes from me , it demands change as soon as it decides so, so I have to surrender directly :)))

One other thing that I found out about myself is that I am not that anti-social. I always think of myself as a person, who does not communicate much with people. Cause honestly I am not the one who will text first, or call first. I always know that people are busy, also I am mostly tired and by the evening not in a very chatty mood, so probably long phone calls and texting is not something you would like to do with me, also my best friends are well aware of that and they stopped to judge me for that very long ago. But man I did not realize how much I used to communicate on daily basis with people.

And maaaaan I miss it. This little chats in coffee shops, in tennis clubs, two three sentence dialogues. Dinners out , good nice brunch. Damn, I am social. I just don’t like socializing with gadgets, but I realized that I had way more socializing on daily basis than most people did. Also I realized that I actually like it. So that was a big surprise for me.

One other very nice thing I found out is that more people actually really want to know how I feel, than I thought. And it is very positive emotion.

So yeah, apart from the fact that I miss my actual life, I found out couple of new things about myself. Or I just got older and it was a coincidence :)))

Since I am in Tbilisi , Georgia now, I also communicated with people I haven’t talked to in ages. I am never home, and when I do come home, I am here only for three days and never have time, so it is definitely a change.

Also I started a petition to try to help tennis players, I launched it 8 weeks ago and it progressed in a way I would not expect. And I learned many good lessons for myself and for the future. I will talk about it in my next post. People can surprise you in many different ways. You never know what to expect.

As for now I am gonna go, let me know if you can, what changed with your distancing? Did you find any new hobby? Or did you finally have time to finish that book you wanted to read? Did your diet change? Any new recipes?

And just tell me all about it 🙂

Xo.Xo. S.S.

ავტორი: Sofia Shapatava

I am tennis player, who travels the world. I want to share stories about my personal experiences, travels and a lot of other things. I have a lot to share and I am willing to share. I want to write the ugly and pretty things that happened to me along the way, throughout of my ten year travels and my life in general. Hope it will be fun. :)

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